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On a related note, it’s “couldn’t have” not “couldn’t of”.

11:42am Jan 14 2022 —

The word is goodbye. Not “good bye”. (Sorry. I was triggered.)

10:55am Jan 14 2022 —

Sure sign the apocalypse is coming: I used the word staycation in a work related communication.

4:29pm Dec 13 2021 —

I went to look something up on Urban Dictionary and it gave me the finger. pic.twitter.com/cTnT0Z10Wr

11:18pm Dec 4 2021 —

To all breakfast cereal companies: If you want me to eat your cereal, stop making the bags so hard to open.

11:42am Nov 7 2021 —

To all the political campaigns that have texted me unsolicited in the buildup to election day: none of you are getting my vote. If you want my vote, don’t text me or call me unsolicited.

11:41am Nov 2 2021 —

Have you ever come up with a simple idea that would make your life so much easier and feel like an idiot for not thinking of it earlier? I have. Just now.

3:37pm Oct 28 2021 —

Apparently, after being shot at by Ray Charles at Ray’s Music Exchange, young Argyle moved from Chicago to Los Angeles and became Bruce Willis’s limo driver. Who knew? #TIL #bluesbrothers #diehard pic.twitter.com/WAADDNuWTE

9:12am Oct 26 2021 —

Your iPhone can reveal exactly where and when it will rain on hidden map golddave.com/cG3yxj Me: DarkSky for FTW! pic.twitter.com/54egvz6inb

5:20pm Oct 21 2021 —

When designing software one must consider usability and how users may get confused by certain UI elements. I’ve had this conversation twice this week. The first time this point was understood in minutes. The second time took hours and still wasn’t undertood.

1:56pm Oct 19 2021 —